Red Bear


a bear often found in the amazon, which originated in czechoslovakia. this once albino bear lived peacefully until it was almost wiped out during ww1 after the americans learned of the germans utilization of them. of this bear “genocide” only two survived, and they became very depressed and often cut themselves. once the war was over they decided to move to the amazon, so they headed south to south-west africa to depart. once in the water these two bears began to have children (they have children in the same manner that gremlins sp-wn off the backs of others when wet). during this long swim across the ocean the bears noticed their children’s skin and fur was red (which is wear there name comes from). once they arrived in south america and reached the amazon there was just 231 of these rare bears alive. these bears also brought over a now endangered tree known as the czech great oak, which provided a water free cover over there land (this is what many scientists believe to keep them from taking over the world).

then in early 2009 zack, jason and myself discovered these bears on a trip to the amazon, and now we have one in the brookfield zoo.
geo: holy s—! is that a red bear?
jason: i think it is…. hey red bear want some candy??
zack: no f—— way….. i’m taking one….
a red-headed member of the bear community.
i’m red-headed, gay, and i’m growin hair all over, so when i grow up, i’m gonna be a red bear.

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Disclaimer: Red Bear definition / meaning should not be considered complete, up to date, and is not intended to be used in place of a visit, consultation, or advice of a legal, medical, or any other professional. All content on this website is for informational purposes only.