Reekter Scale
a base-10 logarithmic scale, used to define the pungency of faeces and or flatus.
n.b. a regular bowel movement may only score a 2 or 3 on the reekter scale, this is normal. however a movement that is released with a burning sensation, appears slurry like and produced with sulfurous gas may still only score a 4 or 5 – as each integer (+1) on the scale is a 10x increase in pungency.
a 7+ on the reekter scale would lead to civilian casualties and/or the apocalypse.
guy : d-mn, after that nandos, protein shake and e.coli outbreak in my gut i took a dump that looked like concrete being poured out of a mixer – scored at least a 6.5 on the reekter scale!
girl : ew gross this date is over!
guy 1: that’s cool, i gotta go get some bleach and febreeze anyway, the landlord came round thinking something died in my apartment
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