Relief Shit
the act of opening ones bowels after holding it for a prolonged period of time. relief sh-ts are often explosive and those lucky enough to have reached a toilet in time describe the feeling as euphoric or like experiencing an -rg-sm.
there are 4 stages leading up to a relief sh-t.
stage 1. a deep grumbling pain develops in the stomach far away from any known toilet, which intensifies very rapidly.
stage 2. panic ensues and victims break out in a sweat as the chocolate banana starts poking its way out.
stage 3. deep concentration sets in as the victim focuses on various -rs- clenching techniques to contain the beast.
stage 4. desperation. by now, the chocolate volcano is due to erupt any second and the victim is literally touching cloth. the end is neigh. a stage 4 victim cannot stand straight nor walk properly.
many times, it will end with the victim franticly fumbling with a door key, trying to gain access to their property, losing vital seconds in the race for the loo.
there is a phenomena related to relief sh-ts where the dark pony becomes more intent on escaping the closer you get to home.
wife’s and girlfriends are notorious relief sh-tters. they wait hours, sometimes days for their partners to leave the house before decimating the toilet bowl. they then clean up the monstrosity they have created just in time for the unsuspecting husbands return.
it is estimated that in the uk alone, 72% of men are married to, or living with serial relief sh-tters.
“g-d i wish he’d leave the house so i can finally have this relief sh-t’
“i went back home as i forgot my car key, you won’t believe me but i caught the wife taking an almighty relief sh-t, had to get the plumber out”
Read Also:
- righty roo
a really lame and dorky way to acknowledge someone. used primarily in place of “ok”, “sure”, ” of course” or “alright” pete: “kyle, can you drive me over to pick up my car from the mechanic?” kyle: “oh, righty roo!”
- roblocks
a misspelled word for roblox. parents/ adults tend to use roblocks as roblox instead. our son is playing roblocks again 1 more definition a misspelled word for roblox. parents/ adults tend to use roblocks as roblox instead. our son is playing roblocks again
- Ron Short Squirt
when you drink so much energy drink that a short burst of liquid sh-t fires out of your -ss uncontrollably. alan had a ron short squirt in the middle of his final exam.
- Ronyetti
a man who has not p–ped, showered, or shaved in a given day or period of time. this is a ‘full ronyetti’. there can be a ‘two-thirds ronyetti’ and a ‘one-third ronyetti’. it’s been a wild one, i’m a full ronyetti at the moment. he’s one nasty ronyetti!
- rubberneck
when you have a b-n-r but suddenly goes soft me and bae were doin’ it last night and i rubber necked 13 more definitions to drive slowly by a car accident (or site having emergency vehicles) and turn the head to see anything gory. this act exacerbates traffic delays. crews pulled the wreckage off the […]