ResTroll

rest-troll – a portmanteau of restroom and troll. a truly disturbed germaphobe who follows unsuspecting victims into the restroom and parasitically attaches themselves to their every move. this is done by the restroll to avoid touching the restrooms interior door handles, and sacrifice you as tribute to the bacterium colonies. be keenly aware as the restroll often takes the form of a normal person. perhaps going so far as to engage in casual conversation to lull you into a false sense of security. however, make no mistake, the restroll is a calculating opportunistic creature. for their presence near you in the restroom was only brought about by your own entrance for relief. this is because a restroll can never enter a restroom alone, less they become trapped until a sacrifice enters allowing their escape. be vigilant in your observation of the surroundings. did that “person” seemingly appear out of nowhere? do they spend an inordinate amount of time focused on your direction? does it seem like they’re trying to expel urine at an ungodly speed and for no apparent reason other than to catch up with you? do they appear to be exiting prior to returning their clothes to proper order, or prior to finishing or maybe even stopping midstream? my dear friend, if you begin to notice even the slightest such action, distance yourself immediately and evacuate with haste, less you become another victim for the restroll.
joe: “hey steve, you won’t believe it! i was nearly caught by a restroll today at work”
steve: “how’d you survive?”
joe: “i noticed he was glancing sour, so i flew out of that place with the speed of 1000 cheetah-unicorn hybrids! that dirty restroll is probably still trapped lol”