Sahuarita High School
you want your kid to be stuck in a h-ll-hole where everyone is rude, sn-bby, cold, and really, really r-t-rded? then sahuarita high school is for you! let’s not forget the dumb–ss rules and teachers who think they’re the best around, but seriously bro- you’re at sahuarita, that means no other school wanted you. sure- we have school spirit with the football team that never wins and the cheerleaders who are either sn-bby or fat as f-ck. academics?
sahuarita has never heard of it!
want a dance where everyone cries and someone has to be drunk because they think it’s cool?
well hurry on down to sahuarita!
want religion shoved down your throat every time you walk to the bus when they throw a bible in your face?
sahuarita’s got that too!
wanna see boys who either wear pants so skinny or so baggy that either way you see their b-lls and small p-n-s?
you’ll love this school then!
do you enjoy seeing f-ggot guys dress up in cowboy clothes because they think they’re cool?
oh yeah, we have this in stock!
want not only an entire teacher faculity that pretty much hates you but also an entire school including the students that hate each other?
then come down to sahuarita!
go see the definition of sahuarita to understand the true meaning of this ah-so wonderful town. if this is your kind of town then come along and suffer!
sahuarita high school teacher: hey u! u got a h0le in your pants that’s a centimeter long!
student: i’m sorry, i never even noticed it this morning.
sahurita high school teacher: oh ok- lyk an entire day of in-skool suspension then along with after-skoolz!
student: this is my first day here though, i didn’t know the rules! i’ve only been heer for five minutes!
sahurita high school teacher: lyk no excuses- we gonna call your parents noa and tell em how bad of a student uz are! u will now be suspended for an entire week! welc-m to sahuarita btw.
student: … d:
-regular sahuarita high school student walks by completely naked with a gun but teachers don’t notice the obvious-
student: -_-“
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