schach
hard to define, easy to love. like a cadbury egg, he’s tough on the outside and gooey and sweet on the inside. he’s full of surprises. one minute he’s pounding drinks at the bar and smart -ssing everyone, the next he’s hauling furniture for a friend in need or making baked goods for the potluck. he will scare you if he’s your supervisor at work, but don’t be fooled. buy him a beer and compliment his mustache and his frosty exterior will start to thaw, letting you know the real him.
there are exactly 2 people on the planet who can wear a kilt: the guy playing bagpipes on the street on scotland, and schach.
don’t f-ck with a schach, unless you’re a sharp-dressed black guy who knows how to make collard greens, in which case write that sh-t on a recipe card because schach is a renaissance man in and out of the kitchen.
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