shardage
happens after you take a wet sh-t and don’t wipe properly. the overlooked dirt soon dries and feels like shards of gl-ss in your -n-l cavity. walking feels like h-ll and requires much re-adjustment.
shardage is commonly mistaken for torn -sshole, which occurs after a p–p is too large to fit through your b-tt at its normal size or after -n-l s-x (ouch and very gay). also mistaken for fire–ss, which occurs after diarrhea and your b-tthole’s exposure to acid
two kids while on a tour of the musuem of natural science:
kid 1: “hey, stop pulling at your -ss.
kid 2: “man i gots da shardage cuz i didn’t have enough time to wipe this morning.”
kid 1: “oooo. are you sure that wasn’t cuz of my d-ck in yo b-tthole last night.”
kid 2: “no. yours is too small for this kind of damage.”
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