sharting spider


a sharting spider is a particularly heinous sub-specie of the “barking spider” in that it’s defense method is not just a warning signal and fowl smell, but also warns potential predators with a deposit of substance known by naturalists as ‘beware brown’. they are particularly fond of burrowing in ‘tighty whiteys’.
subject 1: (notices subject 2’s dirty underwear on the floor) “woah! either you never learned to wipe your -ss or you were born without a sphincter!”

subject 2: “what?….no…i’m dealing with an infestation of sharting spiders. that wasn’t me!”
a sharting spider is a particularly heinous sub-specie of the “barking spider” in that it’s defense method is not just a warning signal and fowl smell, but also warns potential pretadors with a deposit of substance known by naturalists as ‘beware brown’. they are particularly fond of burroing in ‘tighty whiteys’.
subject 1: (notices subject 2’s dirty underwear on the floor) “woah! either you never learned to wipe your -ss or you were born without a sphincter!”

subject 2: “what?….no…i’m dealing with an infestation of sharting spiders. that wasn’t me!”

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