Shrumple
1. a woman of negotiable services of intimacy (see prost-tute)
2. the sound believed by renowned theoretical physicists to be made when a particularly fat person (say, 250 lbs.+) is running with a box containing a large sponge cake (the cake must be sponge for the desired effect) then drops said cake box in their haste and, due to their unwieldly momentum, runs over the box. the ‘shrumple’ in question occurs right at the moment of impact between their foot and the top of the box, then continues for several milliseconds as they inevitably crush the cake itself underfoot. the ensuing panting and swearing on the fat individuals behalf is not included in the sound.
thomas, the neighbourhood fat boy, was running gleefully with his newly bought cake in great expectance of eating it when, all of a sudden, the b-tter stains on his hands caused him to lose his hold on the box, which he jiggled over top of with a loud ‘shrumple’.
simon ackwayus laughed at the fatty with the b-tter stains
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