SIMON TONGUE
man about town. can be seen at most local watering holes and/or golfing establishments. usually a tottenham hotspurs fan. superpowers include: flight. banter. flexible hips.
also capable of achieving superhuman feats using tongue such as: deadlifting b-ll-cks,
tongue press ups. infinite tongue licks.
approach with caution. friendly exterior gives way to deep seated aggression. often mistaken for an inbetweener.
“look over there, i think it’s simon tongue”
“no, its just an inbetweener with a golf club”
“bl–dy h-ll mate did you see that fight?”
“yeah he gave more licks than simon tongue”
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