spartage
a specific type of ownage, traditionally announced by the phrase “this is sparta!” and immediately followed by a swift kick to the chest. a spartage is ideally performed on the edge of a cliff or a large well, but if you happen to be away from these locations, bear in mind that an effective spartage is one that creates a considerable mess.
yesterday as i was walking back to my car, i noticed a cop writing something next to it. he said: “you’re in a bus zone, i’ll have to write a parking ticket.” i stared at him and replied: “parking ticket? this is sparta!” and i kicked him in the chest. taken by surprise, he fell backwards and landed on the street. he had just enough time to say “what the f-” before a bus ran over him and splattered him across the pavement. (bus–ssisted spartage)
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