Sphincter Nazi


in the fps computer game call of duty, it’s that german soldier that materializes in the room that was just cleared, and shoots the player in the back with some species of automatic weapon, making a counterattack impossible.

this primarily occurs when the player doesn’t follow the linear construction of the game’s timeline and sp-wn triggers.

for example: killing every german on a given map prior to actually achieving the objective. after which, while en route to the extraction point, the player is shot and killed by a soldier that apparently dropped from the player’s -ss (since that’s the only place he could have been hiding).
ovserver: dude, why the h-ll are you just running around?
player: making sure there are no hostiles left on this map before i set my charges.
observer: whats it been, half an hour?
player: give or take.
sphincter n-z-: “americaner.” -brrrraaaaaaap-
player: where the fu…
observer: man, you got schooled by that sphincter n-z-.
a f-g

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