St Dennis
st dennis is a notably small village far up on the crack infested mountains of cornwall.
its inhabitants are the textbook definition of down’s syndrome with a hint of mild incest. second only to bodmin in crime and police enthusiasm rates, police do not actually patrol there as the residents “tend to sort their own problems out”. luckily, thanks to their heavy incest culture and morbidly obese pasty consummation communities, their population seems to skyrocket despite heart attacks and property defence methods.
notable locations include the nervecenter of drug operations hall road.
the boscawen hotel, where the festive sport of petrol bombing is known to commence upon the key phrase, ‘they don’t do steak n onion’.
the park or ‘breeding grounds’ where siblings consummate their love for one another in perfect view of the local primary school as to educate the next generation properly.
last but not least, halloween is a grand traditional pastime, filled with egging someone’s house, then when inquiring as to why you do so, your belt buckle flies off and you m-st-rb-t- furiously. while doing so it is proper etiquette to wipe with one hand and continuously teepee with the other.
man: councils got me f-cked, they’ve given me two housing choices…
boy: what are they?
man: it’s either live on the streets or take a luxury home…
boy: not so bad then!
man: in st dennis.
boy: ur f-cked m8
other words include: bodmin, st austell, cornwall.
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