Stratford, CT

a small town.
we have melonheads.. and they are real. go to roosevelt forest and check them out.
2 high schools.
biggest hang out = club 711.
the bk lounge is a close second.
we drink beer.. but thats pretty much it.
we’re good at some sports.
if you don’t have a decent tan or aren’t of a hispanic decent, get out.
stratford girls are the hottest around, surrounding towns say there must be something in the water.
short beach is gorgeous.
we have a really good looking police force (i.e.- officer rivera).
if you have younger friends and no money for tuition, your poor -ss gets housatonic.
if you are a guidette princess or guido papi and cannot resist to escape the hott clubbz in gun wavin new haven.. scsu if right for you!
if you’re feeling rebellious, and drinking at a dry campus gets you riled up, eastern is a great option.
if you like long car rides, and a slightly diverse/redneck population, or simply are void of an ident-ty, western suits your fit.
if you fall into the top 10% percentile of your graduating cl-ss, you may either opt to get the f-ck out of this state if you have a head on your shoulders, or stick to uconn because, well.. they do have a good spring weekend.
in stratford, every appears happy, cheerfuly and continuously smiling.. no one really knows if everyone is just stupid or drugged up on xanax.
girl from shelton high: “hey lisa, where are you going to school next year? i’m going to university of hawaii and then studying abroad in taiwan.”

girl from bunnell high (stratford, ct): “i’m probably going to take a year off and go to housatonic (house of chronic). southern is sooo overrated.”