Taint Shelf
the tiny, almost useless, p-ssenger accommodation on most modern sportsbikes. often referred to as a “pillion”, this small, hard cushion has the effect of bludgeoning the area between the p-ssenger’s genitals and -n-s throughout the ride. because of its height relative to the driver and generally awkward seating position, these seats have a reputation for deterring p-ssengers from wanting to ride along. these seats are a characteristic of the split tail style of motorcycles, opposed to the conventional “banana” seat (single piece) design. the prevalence of this pragmatically useless design can be attributed to the greatly improved aesthetics and improved control of the motorcycle while in full tuck, as the driver can scoot back into the shelf to secure themselves from sliding further rearward.
“dude, do you remember having to ride b-tch on my zx10r?”
“yeah bra, my -ss still huts from that r-t-rded taint shelf…”
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