Tatty Picker
tatty or tatties being the slang for spud or potato, a ‘tatty picker’ is an inhabitant of the republic of ireland. usually of roman catholic faith and gypsy descent, with eyes strangely close together, extremely sensitive to sporting decisions and with an abrasive dislike for french footballing legend theiiry henry. not to be let within a hundred yards of any form of alcoholic beverage, for fear of either trying to befriend or fight you. this inbred race should be left to its own devices and approached only with extreme caution.
i wish that “tatty picker” would stop asking me if i’d like my driveway tarmacked.
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