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the techno viking is a tall, muscular, charismatic, intimidating, german man that danced for the camera in f-ckparade 2000 (a techno street-parade in berlin germany). it is said that he has appeared in other years to follow as well. the f-ckparade developed in reaction to the music restriction (exclusion of gabber music) and commercialization of love parade. additionally, it broached the issue of the techno club “bunker” being closed. the most played styles of music in the f-ckparade are gabber, speedcore, techno, punk, and house.

the techno viking was made famous because of the “kneecam” recording of a blue-haired girl dancing, then being crashed into by some unruly guy, causing the techno viking to sn-tch the guy up by his arms and shove him back where he came running from. the techno viking then pointed at the man and gazed with an extremely fierce glare in his eyes. an aura of fear eminated from the techno viking, causing the man to step down from the confrontation. the techno viking then started dancing wildly through the streets after being given a water bottle from one of his fans.

some opinions say the techno viking is becoming more popular on the internet than the “chuck norris jokes” because the techno viking shows to be a dangerous man if provoked.
“the techno viking doesn’t dance to the music, the music dances to the techno viking”. this is the most popular catch phrase being used by youtubers about the techno viking.
techno viking. a god among men.
“techno viking doesn’t dance to the music. the music dances to techno viking.”
the only man that can actually kill chuck norris
chuck: round house to your face ! !
techno viking dude: shnotsn upsn ja foolzn ! ! (while dancing to techno music playing in the background)
a viking visiting germany, techno vikings heart beats loud enough to provide music for the annual “f-ck parade” in berlin.

able to shatter a persons nerves by simply pointing at them

requires water to be served to him upside down, and is delivered notes on a weekly basis
“this hi-fi sound system runs at 1/10th the volume of techno viking s heart beat”
a bulked up german viking dancing on the streets of berlin at the f-ck parade. can be seen on youtube

he is so superior that his name must be written in caps.
get outa here, technoviking comands you
all hail technoviking
the techno viking is a german techno enthusiast whom makes it his job to defend blue-haired chicks and uphold the balance of bad–ssery whereever he goes. with his mighty finger, he will point and strike fear into the hearts of tools who try to run into (copping a feel, maybe?) blue-haired chicks. he will then dance the night away… h-ll, he’s so bad-ss, he drinks from upside-down water bottles!

he’s also rumored to be the only one who can withstand the atomic-bomb-like-power of a chuck norris roundhouse kick. this can neither be confirmed or denied, because n-body knows just who the techno viking truly is.

see also: man-crush
the techno viking is to bad–ss as andrew dice clay is to not being funny…. aka, techno viking is pretty f-cking bad-ss!

the techno viking is to bad–ss as carlos mencia is to being a rip-off-artist… aka, techno viking is pretty bad-ss.

the techno viking is to bad–ss as sarah palin is to complete and utter moron and failure… aka, techno viking is pretty bad-ss.
an internet meme created on theforum.com thanks to a video of the berlin f-ck parade of 2000 in which a large muscle-bound german man -sserts his authority upon the people and dances to demonstrate his power. he is, technoviking.

all hail technoviking.

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