the 7 levels of shitting

used to describe to a friend how bad the sh-t you are currently having is

1. i think i may be constipated

2. i need to take my pants off for this sh-t

3. i may not come out for a while

4. i’m p-ssing and sh-tting everywhere

5. i’m either on my period or i’m just downright bleeding, but there is blood and sh-t everywhere

6. i’m gonna need help cleaning if i ever come out

7. tell my mommy i love her.
person a: “bro, you okay in there?”

person b: “no, i need help.”

person a: “on the 7 levels of sh-tting scale, which one?”

person b: “number 7…”

person a: “oh no dude…”

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