The Harris


a masterful portrait of the great harris ahmed drawn artfully by an unknown up and coming new artisit, who shall remain anonymous. the portrait has sparked world wide insight and fame internationally, causing a whirlwin effects throughout the small town of rancho cucamonga, california. the portriat appears to be a man of middle eastern decent possibly returning from a brutal and bl–dy war, dressed to impress at his post war feast, complete with five o clock shadow and a ‘thumbs up’ for the world to see. the portrait has sparked many artisist to attempt a recreation of the piece, but none with ever match the awesomeness of the harris.

bibliography of the great harris ahmed:

harris ahmed was born on decemeber 2, 1991 in bloemfontein, south africa to a farming family with modest means. he has since lived in lebanon, france, usa, mexico, russia and jamaica.

he began working at age 9 as a rice picker, shoe polisher and waiter to pay his school fees and those of his four younger brothers and sisters. his hard work and perseverance allowed him to outperform his cl-ssmates nationwide, earning him the prestigious mohsaa (medal of outstanding academic achievement) in 1984 at the age of 13, when he graduated high school.

he then moved to the usa to complete his three majors (mathematics, biomedical engineering and econometrics) at harvard university. he currently holds two phds.

his philanthropic spirit has taken him on humanitarian missions to argentina, brazil, guinea, uganda, myanmar, malaysia and swaziland. he is estimated to have personally helped over 10 million underprivileged children.

growing up in several multi-cultural environments, harris is octalingual. he is a native speaker of mandarin, swahili, russian, french, english, arabic, greek and turkish.

his irresistible good looks and charm have brought him famous girlfriends such as jessica alba, heidi klum, angelina jolie, jennifer lopez and beyonce knowles.

he is the only man to have received the n-bel peace prize three times (1993, 1998, 2001). his acting performances have also earned him several academy awards.
“wow did you see the harris i heard they’re gonna start printing that on money!”
an act following f-ll-t– when the woman, choosing not to swallow the man’s s-m-n, spits the -j-c-l-t- into her hand and throws it at high velocity at the man’s face.
katie went down on david, but he was in for a surprise when she stood up and gave him the harris, knocking him unconscious.

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