the n00d
a piebald dachshund puppy named n00dle rescued from the depths of nowhereville, aka freedom, pennsylvania. she is a crazy p00ch whose extreme adhd leads to nonstop sniffing & a bottomless pit of curiosity. although she is a dog, she is a professional sp00ner giving even the most experienced cuddlers a run for their money.
it has been suggested that, despite her silly antics & obsessive behaviors, she is an intelligent creature. this has been suggested by her mimicking learned behavior, mainly humping both living & stationary objects. surprisingly, what she ch00ses to hump has predominantly been of the female s-x (not including the stuffed, though extremely life-like, stuffed dog).
her favorite snacks include the crotches of used female panties, happy hips chicken jerky, &, yes, unc00ked n00dles.
someone else: “hey, kate, you bringin the n00d?”
me: “well, yes, if by n00d you mean the pup & not pictures of my p00ch.”
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