The Orthodox I-Theater


when two people who desire “s-xual contact” with each other but for insurmountable reasons cannot have said “s-xual contact” (for example: if the object of your l-st is married, betrothed, has herpes, or is a sibling).
a bed sheet/curtain is hung from the ceiling dividing a couch or bed in to two separate (but equal) halves both facing a television which is playing a p-rnographic movie, preferably dp, dvda, gang-bang p-rn, etc. both partic-p-nts face-time each other from opposite ends of the couch while masturbating ferociously and perhaps crying just a little bit.

synonyms- true romance, secret lovers, sad clown love, conjugal-ish visit.
used in a sentence: “hey babe, did you set up the orthodox i-theater yet?” “no, i forgot the sheet and the gang-bang p-rn.” “i hate you so much! i am glad you have herpes and you are the worst brother ever!!!”

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Disclaimer: The Orthodox I-Theater definition / meaning should not be considered complete, up to date, and is not intended to be used in place of a visit, consultation, or advice of a legal, medical, or any other professional. All content on this website is for informational purposes only.