The two biggest lies
1. the check is in the mail.
2. i promise i won’t c-m in your mouth.
the two most undisputed, biggest lies ever spoken of all time. and always spoken with a tone of conviction to convince the other party to relax and believe what they are being told is utterly and completely trustworthy.
1. landlord: “it’s the 5th of the month, and i haven’t received your rent check!”
irresponsible tenant: “hey man, no worries, the check is in the mail!”
landlord: “yeah right, that’s one of the two biggest lies in the world!”
2. girl about to give head: “i really hate the taste of c-m, i swear it will make me gag. so, please promise that you’ll let me know before you finish, ok??”
h-rny dude: “don’t worry baby, i promise that i won’t c-m in your mouth…”
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