thotzarella stick

a very short, annoying, italian thot. they love to start drama, aren’t all that pretty, and probably have an ugly nose. thotzarella sticks are proud to be italian but don’t speak the language, and unknowingly embrace the “jersey sh-r-” style stereotype of italians. they are loud as f-ck and on occasion have a little raspiness to their voices, which is usually the case if the thotzarella stick in question originates from a sicilian background. unlike most italians, thotzarella sticks actually hate their family, but it’s only because their family disowns them for being thots, and don’t wish to support their self-destructive and ho-ish lifestyles. there is a 30% chance a thotzarella stick’s first or middle name is either marie or nicole, and if it just so happens to be a combination of the two then hold on to your f-cking hat. if a thotzarella stick were to move to new jersey, the general populous would -ssume they were originally from there. they most likely have 2,000 followers and up on instagram, but only because of countless guys don’t know them that just want to f-ck. if a thotzarella stick is on bad terms with a person they believe could improve their social image by mere -ssociation, they will try their best to be nice and become better friends with said person for selfish egotistical purposes.
“hey did you end up going on a second date with marie?”
“f-ck no! that little thotzarella stick talked my f-ckin’ ear off with all of this gossip sh-t i didn’t care about! i excused myself from the table and paid the tab early, and now she’s on twitter with emojis all over the place thanking me for a great night and saying we gotta hang out soon! the f-ck?? um how about no???”
“wait like she dm’d you on twitter?”
“no, like she publicly @’d me and i don’t even follow her. she had to go find my account.”
“what the f-ck why would she tweet that??”
“beats the f-ck outta me.”