two ticket ass


a severely overweight aircraft p-ssenger that knowingly defies airline policy and purchases a single ticket for airfare, fully aware their -ss will occupy two or more seats. “two ticket -sses” are usually female, and play dumb as they attempt to board the aircraft, as if not understanding what all the fuss is about. they take perverse pleasure in making the life of the stewardess (aka walrus handler) miserable.
“i’m sorry, madame. you have only a single ticket and this airline has a policy that mandates the purchase of two tickets for severely overweight p-ssengers. you’ll have to go back to the check-in counter. no, mam, this is not a joke.”

“dayum, shanika’s bangin. you see dat barrel she towin? dat some two ticket -ss!”

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