Villa Walsh Academy (VWA)

it’s not 4 years… it’s 4 life.
an all-girls catholic school located in morristown, nj which features old and decaying nuns monitoring the halls. it is a place where ankles are scandalous and too many untucked shirts are grounds for expulsion. it is a place where they love to sing, and will use almost any excuse to burst into harmonic hymns. the lowest gpa for a cl-ss of 50 will be a 3.2, and the senior cl-ss will spontaneously erupt into fistfights to see who gets to attend bc, notre dame, and georgetown. losers will go to loyola, villanova, or fairfield. lunch costs $8, and consists of 8 oz. of “gourmet” mac and cheese. breadsticks, due to increasing thefts, are an extra $2. this school also features a “penthouse suite” – previously nuns’ chambers, these prestigiously located rooms are the current homes for the two most legendary and enlightened teachers at the school and their playful seeing-eye pooch, pam (shout out to reba). the grounds are extensive and beautiful, whether viewed from the bridge full of cacti or from wandering around outside. the school features a gazebo where you can sit but not eat, a funeral pyre placed before the tower (enacting pretend human sacrifices on this is frowned upon), and a statue of mary that looks suspisciously like jesus. students who act up are punished by being made to run from the man-statue of mary up the hill to the funeral pyre.
often -ssociated with delbarton, other than sharing a bus to and from school, there is little -ssociation. probably because everyone’s too tired from having to walk up and down petruvious amounts of stairs all day long. huge amounts of oddly shaped and sp-ced stairs.
a word to the wise: don’t kick a bible down the locker room. they don’t like that either, and you will be smote.
where can you find flame-r-t-rdant plaids aplenty?
villa walsh academy.
a small, all-girls catholic school located in morristown, nj. its student population is very h-m-genous, mostly white and catholic, and the girls are compet-tive, athletic, intelligent and preppy. the school is run by nuns, and the adjoining convent serves as the national headquarters for the religious teachers filippini. known for its emphasis on academics, especially math and science, uniform infractions, spring musical, abundance of singers, and its ugly white sweaters for chapel. it is the sister-school of delbarton.
oh, you go to vwa? you must be a villa gorilla.
a school that every student loves to hate. home to only two types of students: the insane overachievers who’ve never had a boyfriend and the slacker potheads who screw everyone in the county.

cl-ss periods are either spent frantically taking notes or sleeping, depending on which category of student you fall into. the cool teachers enjoy messing with students’ heads and the stupid teachers just try to keep cl-sses under control. however, that is impossible. for every cl-ss there are roughly two troublemakers who can ruin any teacher’s day and make any student’s. these students never try but get good grades anyway.

spirit days are the joy of every villa girl’s existence, it gives them an excuse to look even stranger than they normally do.

lunch periods are spent throwing things at each other or daring each other to eat whatever girls can put together. sometimes a combination of the two ensues and the princ-p-l has to lecture the entire school on proper lunchroom etiquitte.

another interesting fact of villa life that n-body has mentioned yet are the m-sses. these are spent trying to see who can say the f word the most times without anyone looking over. sometimes nuns see girls laughing at each other and give them the holy look of death. these nuns are just angry because the girls got more action last weekend then they did in their whole nunly celibate lives. nuns suck.

after school, students go to their various dorky clubs and take the bus over to delbarton. these bus trips are spent putting on makeup and hanging out the window, screaming their numbers at the athletic field. however, since they are villa gorillas, no one will ever call them. ever.

besides, delbarton boys are all gay.
villa walsh academy (vwa)- the biggest waste of tuition in the morristown area.
an all-girls school with ugly wannabes who think that they are delbarton’s sister school when in all reality, all the delbarton guys hate them.
gorilla: heyyyy you’re from delbarton.. you must like us villa girls

delbarton: -laughs and walks away-
an all-girls school located in morristown, new jersey. it is run by smelly old nuns and is always compared with st. e’s. of course everyone is aware that the villa girls mascot was the knight a few years back, but the delb boys and shp boys started calling them the villa gorillas because they look like gorillas. (st. es girls are called st. easies because villa girls cant get boys even if they paid them so they think that st. e’s girls are easy) they think they are too smart for st. es but the fact is, they made the gorilla their mascot. so now they smell, look, and are gorillas. st. e’s beats villa ten out of ten times without cheating. thats another thing, villa girls cheat in sports to win because they dont have the proper skill level to win farely.
st. es girl: why are the villa girls called gorillas, i thought you liked them?

delb boys: (laugh) pshhhhhhh they should in the zoo!!

villa walsh academy (vwa) is a not a school, its a zoo.
an all-girls catholic high school in morristown, nj run by old smelly nuns and filled with geeks and ugly losers with no social lives. a typical villa girl is hairy and unclean and repulsive. usually, villa girls wish they were remotely as good looking, attractive, and fun as a st. e’s girl. however, this will never be accomplished.
seton hall boy #1: is that a girl or a dog?

seton hall boy #2: a dog