wedgie rules

the rules used to dictate the aplication of a wedgie.

rules:
1. anyone found to be wearing “tighty whities” should be given a wedgie imediately. also, anyone wearing said tighty whities can be given any type of wedgie, at any time. wearing tighty whities is unexcusable.
2. if while performing wedgie, underwear is ripped, the wedgier must repay the victim by either
a) paying them full value of underwear, or
b) ripping the underwear in return in an equal or greater value.
3. a wedgie is always acceptable if the victim was “asking for it” i.e. the waistband was exposed, or the victims overall demeaner is unpleasant.

the following are basic and advanced wedgie techniques.
(- indicates ideal for performance on tighty whity wearer.)

basic variations-

-regular wedgie: the underwear of the victim is pulled sharply up from the back.
-frontal wedgie: the frontal wedgie is the condition of having the victim’s underwear yanked up from the front waistband, either squashing the t-st-cl-s or wedging the underwear material into the v-lv- causing camel toe.
-mervin: a combination of both the regular wedgie and the frontal wedgie, both the front and rear of the victim’s underpants are hoisted upward, causing significant discomfort and humiliation. difficult to perform with any stealth (and thus rare), this variation on the wedgie was popularized most notably by the early 1990s nickelodeon show salute your shorts. can also be executed by a pair of wedgiers (one in front, one in back)

lesser known variations

-jock-lock: after tripping the victim or finding a victim unlucky enough to already be lying face down, one or both feet are bent back and their underwear is wedgied and the leg holes are put around their toes (or the toe of their shoes.) it ends up exposing their rear and gets pulled tighter if they try to move their feet. if someone else is holding down their hands, all they can do is struggle and wedge it in tighter.
-atomic wedgie: the victim has his underwear pulled up over his head and secured on his forehead. although seemingly impossible, the atomic wedgie is totaly doable with the right amount of effort and is ideal to perform on a tighty whitie wearer.
-hanging wedgie: performed by executing some form of basic type of wedgie, and then lifting the victim off the ground, and hanging either the tip of the underwear onto some form of elevated hook device, or jamming an elevated stationary pole of some sort through the underwear leg holes, or by looping rope through the legholes and lifting in a pully like fashion. for this particular wedgie to be authentic, the victim’s legs must not be able to reach the ground.
-propeller wedgie: induced by giving the victim a regular wedgie, then jamming some form of pole between the legholes, then somehow twisting the form around, tightening the material and wedging the material in the victim’s b-ttocks. a variation is when a shirt is then placed on the pole, so they are stuck, also known as a “scarecrow wedgie”.
-ripper (or super) wedgie: when the wedgie is delivered with so much force that the underwear rips.
-rambo wedgie
a derivation of the ripper wedgie in which the waistband of the underwear is ripped off completely. the waistband is then put into a figure of eight and folded over in order to halve the circ-mference. the one-time owner of the pants must then wear his old waistband as a head scarf .
-pants down wedgie: a combination of both pulling the victim’s pants down (pantsing), standing on the pants and whilst the victim is trying to pull their pants up, performing a wedgie.
-tape wedgie: the same as a normal wedgie, but the waistband of the underpants is taped somewhere inaccesible, thus not allowing for the wedgie to be undone.
-gang wedgie:
victim is grabbed by group of people, who then give wedgie in any form to victim, as well as as many wedgies as the group decides to give and even combinations. this can end then in putting them in a jock-lock and leaving them alone to get out themselves
-tied up wedgie: victim is given a regular wedgie and then has their hands put through the leg holes of the pants. the hands are then fastened to each other.
-wedgie deluxe: victim is given a regular wedgie and then has string run through the leg holes. the string is tied to something else, with the victim rotated so as to be facing away from the object with the string running past their head. a group of people then pull on the victim’s ankles.
-drag wedgie: when the victim is pushed or tripped and then peforming a wedgie and dragging the victim by their underwear while still on the ground.
-belt wedgie: the victim is given a normal wedgie until hte legholes are exposed. at this point the victims belt is removed and reinserted as normal with hte exception of the belt now being looped through the legholes as well. for added diffictuly in removing, the belt can be inserted backwards so the buckle is now on hte back.
-handcuff wedgie: the victim is given a normal wedgie until the legholes are exposed. now, handcuffs are cuffed through the legholes, and some type of pole just high enough that hte victim must stand on their tip-toes.
the wedgie rules must be followed when administering wedgies.
rules:

1: a wedgie should be given if it asked for. such as when a person’s waistband shows.

2: if a person is wearing tighty whities, give it to him just for wearing them. they are unacceptable.

3: melvins should be given to all tighty whitie wearers, then they should have to be pantsed, and atomic wedgied.

4: if the waistband comes off during a wedgie, the wedgied shall wear it on their head all day long.
hey, mac, your wearing tighty whities! that means, wait i have to check the wedgie rules, you get a melvin!