Weeki Rage
a rare form of road rage, said to originate from weeki wachee, florida. proclaimed by locals as an incurable disease and is believed to be a form of “zombism”. traditional symptoms include:
1) foul language, with excessive use of four letter words.
2) ocular bleeding or discharge.
3) head trauma, likely from self inflicted blunt impact with individual’s dashboard and/or steering panel.
in some extreme cases individuals may experience uncontrolled use of projectile feces, erections lasting as long as 3 hours from infection time, spontaneous combustion and brain aneurysm resulting in death.
also referred to as: wachee rage, severe acute road rage disorder.
michael wasn’t accustomed to driving in florida, being that he is from long island, new york. while in most locations driving he experienced road rage, his condition declined while driving through weeki wachee. his autopsy revealed he suffered from weeki rage, his unfortunate cause of death.
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