Westport


ah, westport. what to say about this little town in fairfield county in connecticut. a gorgeous town ridden with filthy rich people that have so much money that they have nothing better to do than to drive around in their luxury cars and spoil their children rotten. these children are living better right now than many the majority of the united states ever will. so what do they do? they buy all designer clothing, get either a range rover, a bmw, or a lexus when they turn 16, get incredibly drunk and stoned at least twice a week. go figure. on the other hand though, they mostly manage to do incredibly in academics and sports and many of the children will go to ivy league schools. westport is probably one of the whitest areas that you will ever find. there are maybe 10 african american families in westport at a maximum. their idea of ghetto is norwalk, connecticut which is definitely no harlem or anything of the sort. these peoples lives are spent at parties, renovating their already mic-mansion homes, playing tennis, and getting their hair re-dyed. vacation is almost a whole different topic in and of itself. people are always going to some tropical island, europe, a cruise, martha’s vineyard, nantucket, or cape cod. it is unavoidable. oh yeah, and don’t forget the celebrities who live there that these people often see in the supermarket, barnes and n-ble, or just walking around town like everyone else. the fc definitely gives the oc a run for their money. no pun intended of course.
befriend everyone and you will be good.
a beautiful, mid-sized town in connecticut. it has great shopping areas and vast estates, particularly in the greens farms area. some waterfront homes can cost in excess of 20 million dollars. unlike many of the so called “wealthy” long island and new jersey towns westport and the neighboring fairfield county towns do not feel the need to wear their wealth on their sleeves. however, everyone knows outside of manhattan and the hamptons, fairfield county is the center of high priced homes and high cl-ss lifestyle in the metro-area. westport is one of the greatest and richest towns in fairfield county.
forget westport being the richest towns in connecticut. it is one of the richest in america. it is a great place to live and a haven for judeo-protestant wealth.

now bring around the maybach!
do i feel guilty that i own 2 multimillion dollar homes, carry multiple credit cards, drive a bmw, own a boat, belong to a yacht club, and get my choice of ivies and play varsity sports even though i spend my weekends so wasted or stoned that i don’t remember them? no. you can kiss my -ss.
don’t be mad cause my daddy fired your daddy
an area of kansas city, missouri, that is home to dozens of clubs, bars, venues, and restaurants. it is a very good place to go if you spend all your money on armani shirts but you drive a 93 nissan sentra.
it is also a good place to find loose cocaine sl-ts.
armani shirt 1: hey brad, let’s go downto westport tonight.
armani shirt 2: right on bra! let’s take your sentra.
westport is:

1. a rich -ss white town located in fairfield county in southwestern connecticut

2. home to many famous people including paul newman as well as the 2nd home to many new yorkers

3. a town where everybody wears lacoste, polo, a&f, seven, and juicy and where the average pair of jeans costs about $200

4. a place where the kids are expected to go to a top school (duke, cornell, harvard, yale, stanford) and where all the varsity sports especially boys volleyball kick -ss.

5. home to many kids who could drink a college senior under the table.

6. a place where the cheapest house on the block is about 2 mil

7. full of kids who get a bmw, mercedes, or a jeep for their 16th birthday and go to their summer “cottage” or their apartment in europe of the summer.

8. the home to many that live for 4:20
mike: hey man, what are you doin tomorrow

john: are you serious dude? it’s 4/20

mike: sick. does this polo shirt smell like pot?

john: d-mn were you smoking inside your bmw again?

mike: yeah but its okay. my parents are too busy redecorating our macmansion to notice.

john: so your chill than. you wanna come to a kegger up at my beach house this weekend?

mike: h-lls yes
one of connecticut’s richest towns. the kids here do m-ssive amounts of drugs (weed, blow, and an occasional e pill) and party extremely harder then most other suburban communities. despite the excessive partying these kids have seen the world three times over and are some of the most cultured and cl-ssiest individuals around. young adults between the ages of 16-25 basically live in a drugged out haze of parties and s-xual favors. kids quietly compete with one another about who has the biggest summer home, who goes to the better college and who can am-ss the most materiel possessions. to speak openly about this compet-tion is socially unacceptable and very unbecoming. the public school girls can be seen driving their benz’s, bmw’s, audi’s, volkswagen’s and land rover’s around town at all hours of the night looking for a house party or the next local bar to “chill” at. the private school girls can be seen in the back of their parents chauffeured bentley attending amazing sweet sixteens, debutante b-lls, and benefit galas while the whole time being strung out on some prescription drug. welcome to the world of westport.
gfa girl 1: i want to go shopping this weekend and westport’s main street just won’t do. i have shopped there the last 3 weekends.

gfa girl 2: omg! i know! lets see if my parents can arrange a jet for us so we can go to london and shop on bond street.
the greatest town on earth. everyone is really nice…..sure some people are sn-bby…but there are some people like that in every town. like anywhere, you have to make the right friends and you have to find the right group of people to hang out with. just because alot of people have boats and huge houses doesn’t mean that thay are lazy…on the contrary….it means they worked hard to make the money and they deserve to use it in the way they want to.
i love this townnn and you should too
person 1: your house is huge you lazy brat!
person 2: shut up. i worked for this cash and maybe if you got off of your hipocritical -ss once in a while and learned to use your money wisely…you could live this way in westport

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