Zammuto
a very hairy individual. usually can be seen driving a soccer-mom mercedes benz, wearing oversized sungl-sses, or eating a delicious hoagie consisting only of meat and cheese. can be seen dancing to s-xyback, or the remix of s-xyback; hairyback. if you are mexican owning a car, do not park it anywhere near zammuto’s pathway. he is known to eat uncrustables, drop them while driving, bend down to pick them up, then crash into a parked car. also do not be surprised if yuo see him early in the day and hes completly shaven, then later unt he day you run into him and hes got a 5 o’clock shadow. zammuto enjoys going home, making up terrible stories and sharing them at lunch; making everyone laugh at his lame story. he has also been known to threaten people by sending them hoagies.
“d-mn that guy is really hairy. yeah he must be a zammuto.”
“wanna get a sandwitch zammuto? sure lets go to the hoagie shack.”
“i have a hairy back, yep. i got a fro and its on my sack, yep.”
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