Zoidberg

despite being the ‘unpopular’ character in the series, dr. john zoidberg is one of the most popular characters of the hilarious show futurama, known for his voracious appet-te, strange mating rituals, and complete inept-tude at dealing with human patients. speaking of which, he’s not human; he’s a giant lobster. who wears sandals. is also known for his famous “w00p w00p w00p w00p” noise he makes when running away from danger. loved by fans of the show, hated by the characters (for being lazy, disgusting and glutenous). second only to bender in hilarity.
(planet express has been blown back through time to the 1950s, the site of roswell air base, and zoidberg has been captured by army recruits and is being interrogated by president truman)
truman: “if you come in peace, surrender or be destroyed. if y’here to make war, -we- surrender.”
zoidberg: “both good… the important thing is; i’m meeting new people.”
president truman: “bush-wah! now, what’s your mission? are you planning to make some alien/human hybrid?”
zoidberg: “are you coming onto me?!”
president truman: “hot crackers! i take exception to that!”
zoidberg: “i’m not hearing a no…”
dr. john zoidberg on the show futurama. he is the planet express doctor. he likes acceptance and scavenging. he hates love rivals and invertebrates. he’s a crustacean.
zoidberg: what do i smell or something? sniffs armpit sighs
a charactor on futurama, considered by some a od and is in my opinion the best charactor ever!
hermes: ” your getting as jumpy as much as zoidberg does when you mention food!”

zoidberg: what?? -looks around suspiciously- food?”
an extremely unattractive female sharing characteristics similar to that of the futurama character: lazy, disgusting and particularly glutenous.
the sound of her thighs rubbing together provides us with the much dreaded ‘woop, woop, woop’ noise.
i dont know if you heard, but your ex-girlfriend is a total zoidberg now!
to insert ones face between a woman’s two br–sts and say:
“whoop whoop whoop whoop whoop whoop whoop”. for best results, move head as if performing a motorboat
that was no motor boat…. that was a perfectly executed zoidberg.
when you use a latex glove for a condom but leave the glove intact and let the remaining fingers dangle.
i was out of condoms, so i had to pull a zoidberg
a zoidberg is when a friend gives you a hand job with a crab. he/she positions the crabs claw around your p-n-s, and the friend then jerks the crab up and down. in essence, the zoidberg is a dutch-rudder via crab claw.
professor farnsworth: “good news everybody! i just got a zoidberg!”
fry: “ewww, you let him touch you?”
professor farnsworth: “good g-d no! i had bubble gum fondle me through half a fiddler crab.”