lethargitis
an inflammation of the laziness caused by pressing biological needs that have been ignored for far too long. this condition affects people of all ages who have been sitting around gaming or watching tv for 8 or more hours. onset can be sudden with little or no warning. symptoms include soreness, hunger (but reluctance to prepare food), b.o. and extreme frustration. a lethargitis sufferer may often need only to “walk it off,” but in some cases may pose a danger to themself or others. at worst, their psyche may be shattered by the sudden, jarring return to real life.
mom: it was so strange! one minute my little 30-year-old danny was just playing his xbox, the next he had his head smashed through the drywall, screaming for hot pockets.
doctor: mmhmm, and how long was he on the couch with his gaming doodad?
mom: oh, since he woke up this morning at eleven, i suppose.
doctor: sounds like a textbook case of lethargitis. use the frozen food as bait to get him outside, then lock the doors and he should be back to normal in an hour.
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