wangpire
n. w-ng·pire-
a w-ngpire is an ent-ty who nibbles w-ngs for sustenance, feeding upon the protein inherent in s-m-n. they prey upon lonely males of about 20-75 years old. recent studies indicate a preference for columbian men between 65 and 67 years of age. much like the fabled vampires of old, the w-ngpire has strong aversion and weakness to certain substances. among them are herpes, v-g-n-s, and rachel. many come to w-ngpires in hopes of s-xual release but come away haggard, sickly, sterile, dead, or a w-ngpire themselves.
all w-ngpires were, at one time, human, but have since mutated by having another w-ngpire bite their p-n-s in mid-f-ll-t–.
etymology-
the word w-ngpire is a portmanteau, formed from the words vampire and w-ng.
history-
w-ngpires are actually of vampire descent, a branch long since split from the great vampire houses. they were cast out from the others for being incessantly and unrelentingly gay, a trait not much admired in the proud vampire families. free of restriction, they quickly found they could bring together their two greatest needs, w-ng nibbling and vampirity, as one. as h-m-s-xuality came to see some social acceptance in the recent decades the w-ngpires prospered immensely. the age of vampires was waning and the exiles became the great. many of the larger w-ngpire houses kept harems of upwards of 50 men, and nibbled as they pleased. some even went so far as to keep men stationed all around their estates to serve as ever-present buffets.
Read Also:
- Lungie
when snot is snorted into the throat and hocked into the mouth, then spit out. this is usually a thicker mucous than normal spit, and goes further. it also has a much sweeter and delightful taste than normal spit. lungies are especially deadly when they are hocked in conjunction with a bl–dy nose. it’s choice […]
- Shredderboarder
a punk skateboarder who hangs out in the back of gas stations smoking weed. shredderboarders make up for their lack of strength in numbers, they travel in packs usually of 5-15. if you ever see a shredderboarder alone tell him to land a kickflip.(shredderboarders cannot land the simplest of tricks so they sit back and […]
- laughing jag
a fit of hysterical laughter people have when they are high on drugs or overcome by a situation. we were so stoned we went on a laughing jag for about an hour.
- War Dong
when a man comes home after boning his mistress and has s-x with his wife. “war dong’ dude jeff is so gross and wrong he was out with some chippy and after banging her came home to his wife and had s-x with her too using his war dong and without a shower!
- War of Spanish Succession
a war that was fought between all major european powers from 1701–1714. at the time, the hapsburg dynasty. because the hapsburgs wanted to keep power, the frequently in-bred with each other in addition to marrying members of other monarchies, such as france. well, all this in-breeding resulted in charles ii, a king who was mentally […]