beached whale
when you take a dump while sitting on the toilet backwards so that your fecal matter ends up on the dry part of the toilet and not in the water.
last time i used gabe’s bathroom i left a gnarly beached whale.
24 more definitions
a t-rd so big it comes out of the water in the sh-tty 1.6 gallon low flow toilet.
following the big mexican dinner, jim put a beached whale in the toilet.
or
the stench of jim’s beached whale rose from the toilet bowl.
when fecal matter in a toilet is only partly submerged in water and partially lay on the dry porcelain of the toilet bowl.
“sh-t. look at that beached whale! sorry brown buddy, i didn’t mean to let you perish like that.”
similar to awkward turtle, denoting the occurance of an awkward situation.
the beached whale is performed by placing one hand on top of the other, face up, and thumbs rotating.
jb walked into a room full of naked hispanic men, all playing the flute while whipping each other with palm leaves.
to alleviate the awkward situation, jb starts to freestyle rap. this makes the entire situation even more awkward, and the naked hispanic men all begin to do the beached whale.
an individual who is confined to their bed due to their morbid obesity; one who wallows in their own excrements.
“whoa! look at that beached whale”
a beached whale is a piece of p–p so large that it leaves the water of the toilet. this usually leaves a mark as well because the p–p touches directly onto the dry part of the toilet. it can often be bragged about between guys. however, girls will not be impressed by the feat of a beached whale and will most likely result in her not wanting to have s-x with you.
guy 1: dude, i left i huge beached whale in the toilet yesterday. it was like the third one of my whole life.
guy 2: awesome, you should have taken a picture.
guy: hey, i have a picture of the beached whale i left in the toilet yesterday. do you want to see it?
girl: ew, you’re disgusting. i will never have s-x with you.
a really fat chick stranded outside a bar after closing time looking for a guy to take them home.
ryan, i thought you were gonna rescue that beached whale last night.
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