English Bulldog
“the bulldog is a breed with characteristically wide shoulders and a matching head. there are generally thick folds of skin on a bulldog’s brow, followed by round, black, wide-set eyes, a short muzzle with characteristic folds called “rope” above the nose, with hanging skin under the neck, drooping lips, and pointed teeth. the coat is short, flat and sleek, with colors of red, fawn, white, brindle (mixed colors, often in waves or irregular stripes), and piebald.
in the us, the size of a typical mature male is about 55-60 pounds and that for mature females is about 45 pounds for a standard english bulldog. in the united kingdom, the breed standard is 55 pounds for a male and 50 pounds for a female.
while some canine breeds have their tails cut or docked soon after birth, bulldogs are one of very few breeds whose tail is naturally short and curled.”
about half the bulldogs you will meet will be fine, but the other half are true terrors and should be put out of their misery. over-bred and over-priced, they’ll hardly be able to breath, can hardly play, have sensitive stomachs and skin, deformed teeth, a weird curled in tail, and a horrible habit of rubbing their netherlands all over your wall… much like a bear scratches his back. combine that with horrible gas, and you wonder why g-d continues to let these things exist.
1. the english bulldog is a great family dog for some.
2. a sh-t stained, breathing disabled monster whose overpriced food and expensive medical bills will soon put you in the poorhouse.
guy 1: “hey you want to go to joe’s house tonight to watch the game?”
guy 2: “h-ll no, his swamp creature ruins it for me.”
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