Fairysics

the study of the fundamental particles of h-m-s-xuality. the sole pioneer of this field was katherine mc. katie m.’s work includes the discovery of dykons and queerons and the creation of the standard model of f-ggotry. the field of fairysics still has some questions to answer, such as some gaps in the theory that have been filled with gooey, salty, mysterious particles known as bikerdykons and c-ckgobblerons, which haven’t been found yet.
fairysics, in short, states that an individual’s s-xuality is defined by the presence of dykons and queerons in the body. heteros-xual males have a substantial amount of queerons, while heteros-xual females have a similar amount of dykons. h-m-s-xuality occurs when an individual has an imbalance (i.e. gay men have too many queerons and lesbians have too many dykons). a person’s libido is affected by the overall amount of either subatomic particle. for instance, the as-xual has virtually none of either dykons or queerons and bis-xuality is simply a balance in dykon and queeron levels. now, these subatomic particles are constantly being absorbed and emitted by people, which is why it’s so dangerous to be around too many h-m-s-xuals of the same gender if you wish to remain straight — it is a phenomenon known as gaydiation. the detection of this is called “gaydar,” although not everyone possesses this (mainly it is inherent among h-m-s-xuals and lesbians, although some scientists agree there is a certain degree of gaydar within some heteros-xuals). experiments by the military are currently under way to harness this gaydiation into some sort of gayzer. it would be wrist-mounted, and fired by the wrist-flick gesture, with a lispy voice pr-nouncing “thap! you’re gay!”. current models have fabulous factors of around 50, but there are plans to create a gay-bomb which would spread gaydiation quickly and turn everyone within a few square kilometers into liberachi, though some models describe victims as having the appearance of elton john.