Flatucense


a product placed in one’s -ss to make their farts smell like baked goods. these are chemically engineered suppositories designed to achieve critical m-ss upon exposure to methane and catalyze to emit odors that intermingle with ones flatulence. initial popular brands of this incense for the -ss were b-ttered popcorn, chocolate chip cookie dough, and apple pie. it is rumored that old spice, irish spring, and black licorice flatucense are in the works.
gringo: wow, your mom must be baking 30 dozen cookies.

i.p.dailey: no, man. i had broccoli, crab cakes, and brussel sprouts for lunch and i’ve been dropping enough -ss to run a bio-gas powered 18-wheeler. fortunately, i put in a flatucense and you get to smell my -ss-baked chocolate chip cookies instead.

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