Hasselhoff


verb. to run in slow motion
dude, quit h-sselhoffing it and come here. jack-ss

dont h-ssel the hoff
h-sselhoff, david

a literal g-d among men.

most well known in the states for his roles in baywatch, knight rider, various cameos, and infamous popularity in germany.

his finest moment was, by far, a role in the star wars knock-off star crash, in which he played the prince of the universe alongside a texan robot, a p-rn star, the dad from the sound of music, and some random guy with the ability to see the future.

the move also features sp-ce cavemen, sp-ce amazons, and a giant sp-ce station shaped like a hand.

go see it.
i’m not saying i’m gay or anything, but i would so do david h-sselhoff.
h-sselhoff, david.

the most envied man of the early 90’s.
“there are many dying children out there, who’s last wish is to meet me.”
– david h-sselhoff managing to be both rude and offensive.
verb. to quickly and sloppily eat a greasy food while drunk.

past tense: h-sselhoffed
i was so drunk last night that i stopped at wendy’s and h-sselhoffed a 1/4 lb. double stack.

someone riding a bicycle at night. (nightrider)
i almost hit that h-sselhoff i didnt even see him.
a phrase spoken to someone after sneezing, as if to protect, or guard from evil spirits; may be used in place of “g-d bless you”
h-sselhoff.
verb, present tense. to have one’s chest hair stick out above his garments, such as a t-shirt or turtleneck.
h-sselhoffing, h-sselhoffed, h-sselhoffs.
synonym: chubes (combination of “chest” and p-b-s”)
peter is h-sselhoffing over his tan t-shirt.

Read Also:

  • Canadian Parking Meter

    (cpm) a s-x postion requiring a prost-tute, a roll of quarters, a pocket knife and a bottle of canadian maple syrup. this is an extremely difficult maneuver. it requires a lot of vigor and practice. i have been able to accomplish this feat only twice, and i am considered a canadian parking meter guru. this […]

  • can-gab

    ipa: kan gab 1. n. conversation (not always with a stranger) between stalls in a public toilet. 2. v. (plural) to converse while high on drugs in a bathroom. 3. n. trivial communication (usu. speech), oft. self-rectifying; (adj.) absurd and/or off topic. 1. listen, jim, i overheard some wicked can gab back there, i think […]

  • Can I borrow a feeling?

    the t-tle of a song written by simpsons’ character kirk van houten during his divorce with luann van houten in season 4, eposide 4 (a milhouse divided). aired december 1, 1996. can i borrow a feeling? can you lend me a jar of love? hurtin’ hearts need some healin’ take my hand with your glove […]

  • pachuche

    spanish for tobacco or cigarette rolling paper fumo pachuche. i smoke tobacco another word for a v-g-n-; a person that’s just being a straight up b-tch. after taking that 9 inch d-ck, my pachuche really hurts. that girl is such a pachuche for ripping my number up right after i gave it to her.

  • Ass-to-Mouthwash

    a high test mouthwash used only after one is atmed. an extremely acidic concoction, not to be used more than once a week to prevent withering of the gums, melted teeth or disintegration of oral tissue -oh jesus, rocco was really feelin’ it last night, he f-cked me in the -ss then busted his nut […]


Disclaimer: Hasselhoff definition / meaning should not be considered complete, up to date, and is not intended to be used in place of a visit, consultation, or advice of a legal, medical, or any other professional. All content on this website is for informational purposes only.