monties

“monties” are the glands of montgomery, sometimes called montgomery glands. they are sebaceous glands in the areola of the human nipple. during during breast feeding, these glands make oily secretions (lipoid fluid) to keep the areola and the nipple lubricated and protected from irritation caused by the baby’s suckling. hence, these glands are particularly prominent in women.

since the montgomery glands are more visible in women, they are commonly regarded to be a secondary s-x characteristic, by men. (yeah!) the montgomery glands are not always visible, even in women. in some women, the montgomery glands become raised when the nipple is s-xually stimulated, similar to goose b-mps on cold skin. in other women, the pigmentation of the montgomery glands makes them more visible, at all times. usually, pregnancy and breast feeding will make a woman’s montgomery glands more prominent. hence, some men regard these glands instinctively as an attractive sign of fertility.

they are named after dr. william fetherstone montgomery , the irish obstetrician who first described them, in the olden days, 1797-1859. yeah, monty! (they let guys look at a lot of weird stuff, in the olden days, didn’t they, dad?)
“that girl’s ex says she’s got nubbly dark monties all over her chocolate brown areolae. when she’s really hot, her monties perk up like gooseb-mps, makin’ her look like she’s really cold… weird…”

“since my girl’s been breast feeding her baby, her pink areolae got lots bigger and redder, with perky red monties all over them”

“my girl’s got light brown puffy nipples, but her monties are real dark, like freckles. i like ’em that way, but she is like real embarressed and thinks that somethun is wrong with ’em… go figger…”

“my ex had permanently puffy nips, but always smooth as b-tter… no monties at all…”
a man who is smart, shaped like a greek god, and who is very, very, very s-xy!!!
bianca: omg!!! did u just see that guy?!
raven: i know!! his name must be monty because he certainly looks like one!
a male with exceptionally large genetalia usually 11 1/2 inches or more. as in monty python therefore having a python as male genetalia. partners are usually referred to as snake charmers.
why am i so happy? i was with this guy last nite, he was called dave but i’ll be calling him monty from now on!
common name given to british military genius, field marshall bernard law montgomery, 1st viscount montgomery of alamein (and of hindhead).

monty outwitted erwin rommel, the “desert fox” at el alamein, and won wwii in north africa.
monty defeated rommel.
a person who dates or hooks up with a friend of a close family member in secrecy.
he had s-x with his sister’s best friend, and she doesn’t know? such a monty.

she’s dating her dad’s bestfriend’s son?! what a monty move.
a person who cannot stop themselves from playing pokemon obsessively, restarting multiple times for their own enjoyment.
“d-mn, hes such a monty!”
“i know, too much pokemon.”
(n) a form of jailbait that is extremely deceptive and dangerous. usually between the ages of 15 and 18, they make it very difficult to for the average male to tell whether or not they are of age.
dude, i think that girl i hooked up with at the party last night was a monty, because she left early to get ready for school; high school.