PokeWanker
an alternate function for the “pokewalker” device bundled with the new pokemon “heartgold” and “soulsilver” games.
the device is a pedometer, which rewards players in proportion to the number of steps they take. its counting function may be accelerated by rapid masturbational movements of the hand.
caution must be taken, as prolonged auto-erotic contact of this kind may lead to contraction of the pokerus virus, which essentially makes your d-ck level up faster.
not to be confused with pokesturbate.
pokew-nker user’s manual:
1) strap device to hand.
2) find gardevoir p-rn.
3) m-st-rb-t- furiously.
4) reach level 100.
5) ?????
6) profit
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