rossi-itis


a virulent disease causing inflammation of the cerebral cortex resulting in severe loss of the sufferer’s cognitive faculties and zombie-like effects. it is highly contagious but is transmitted to only those with below average intelligence who are exposed to contact with yellow merchandise emblazoned with the number “46”. curiously, sufferers feel no ill effects and actually experience a kind of m-ss euphoria for most of their lives except for roughly 18 times per year when they are simultaneously struck with deep depression for a full week commencing on a sunday. they compensate for this by watching replays of old races where rossi has beaten his fiercest rivals.
david: what’s wrong with jackie and raymond? they seem unable to focus and are running around like they’ve lost their minds.
fred: they have, mate, they suffer from rossi-itis.

grant: i just saw borish crying on tv. what’s the go?
nonie: he has a severe case of rossi-itis and just heard that rossi missed out on winning the championship. again.

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