shart cathedral
not all sharts are the equal. there are minor incident sharts, producing small skidmarks, and then there are major incident sharts, in which one must take immediate precautions to counteract effects on clothing and atmospheric odor. major sharts produce more than a mere fecal matter ‘dusting’; instead, they produce excrement product of the amount and color approximating a half eaten, completely and fully rotten apple, wholly browned and smushed and rubbed into the cotton fabric of some white (preferably heavily worn fruit of the loom) cotton underwear. this pair of underwear, in this case, is our shart cathedral: it is the vecile of evidence for this most breathtaking shart, evoking almost religious observation and worship.
dude, that was quite a thunderous wet fart! did you shart?
i dunno, i better check. i think i did quite a number on my tighty whities.
dude, don’t throw them away. keep them as your shart cathedral.
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