when you’re drunk and you can’t be on top because you have limited motor functions. so you offer to bottom like a starfish…. but then the jackhammering causes sickness… and then sh-t gets sloppy.
kelly: so totally saw that you houdini’d out with that guy last night, did you?…..
sarah: …. i was a total slopabottumus on that one. i didn’t even ask for his number. i just bailed.

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