the last text that’s sent from your phone by your loved ones so people know you’re dead and not to text you anymore

before i die i have to make sure i write a will and the text i want my loved ones to send when i’m dead it’s my last will and textament
the way people are supposed to text. so instead of oh my god its omg
wow, following the textament makes you text fast!

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  • shmep

    1. a really annoying person who gets on everyone’s nerves 2. someone who thinks they are so popular, but everyone is just pretending to like them 3. the captain of the chess club tommy: isn’t richard such a shmep omg!? rita: naw, that’s rude he is my friend

  • dutch present

    a present your boyfriend gives you that you can both share but only he will enjoy ” oh how lovely, tickets to see andy murray in some blokes tennis tournament ive never heard of. well you can take your dutch present and go on your own”

  • bazo

    bag of juice, drunkard the geezer on the corner’s on old bazo.

  • monday fingers

    the inability to type, or perform other high-dexterity tasks properly on a monday, often because of weekend hangover. “gah! i can’t type this morning. dang monday fingers.”

  • what a solid

    a phrase used to indicate an achievement or any good occasion. can also be used to describe people. a: i got a 100 on my math test. b: what a solid a: my girlfriend finally sucked my d-ck b: d-mn, what a solid

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