Utica College
one of the worst college inst-tutions in new york. every team sucks except women’s basketball and sometimes men’s hockey. half the population is african-american, the other half is too scared to leave their rooms. 39% of the girls are lesbian, 89% of whats left are ugly. the weather blows, the financial aid sucks, the town it’s located in is dead and gone. the most fun thing to do is 20 minutes away at club lava. some utica clubs are cool too, when they stay open. that is, if you like drugs, illegal operations, guns, knives, and deaths. sometimes the gr-ss is green, that’s a plus. the dorms look like an insane asylum, and someone out of third grade could get accepted here.
5th grader: mommy, well i ever go to college?
mom: don’t worry son, there’s always utica college.
5th grader: can i play football there?
mom: anyone with eyes and 2 legs can. you’re all set!
1 more definition
a college that wishes it was a university. it’s stuck in the middle of upstate new york. not only does it drain students of their money, but it also does not provide sufficient amount of financial aid. they treat their students like cr-p. with how c-cky the football team is you think they would be able to have a winning season. utica college really puts the uc in suck.
boy1 i’m going to utica college in the fall.
boy2 wow, good luck. it’s bad news there.
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- Utica Eye
when you’re way past drunk 3 drinks ago, yet somehow still up. still belligerent, and wanting to talk to your friends, yet n-body can understand you, or wants to hold you up. he was schenectady eye at 6. he’s surp-ssed that to utica eye about a half hour later
- Utica Face
a native of utica, ny who exhibits an expresionless look of despair and emptiness, arising from having spent an entire lifetime in utica. it is the expression of having lost all hope and the realization that they will never be able to get out of that awful city. are you bored and depressed, or is […]
- Utica Girl
a woman from (utica, ny). loves fake tans and she thinks striped nails with gem studs look “cl-ssy”. thinks all children are on wic and the heap program is a family tradition. collects some sort of public -ssistance yet still buys cigarettes and goes to club lava. typically has at least one child from her […]
- Utica, Mi
full of teenagers who’s days are spent high as all h-ll. your either high or completely wasted. 10 year olds have cell phones, and by 13 they’re f-cking there boyfriends. everyones squeezed into uhs were you’ll either have the best or the worst times or your life. everyone knows everyone, partys every weekend… and you’ll […]
- Uticano
a puerto rican or other latin american who came to utica, ny via new york city, florida or california any number of years ago and has made a life for him or herself in this decaying cesspool of forgotten human beings as either a bus driver, landlord, police officer or any other job that pays […]